i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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