I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
