its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize