And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize