She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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