ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
