I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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