TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
