I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
