when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
my liver is dry heaving
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
