HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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