This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize
