Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I just want to make out with him forever
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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