YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
