Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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