How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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