did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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