My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
