She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
