Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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