I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
