i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
