You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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