So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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