now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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