They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
My feet surprised me
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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