She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
This house was built for laser tag.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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