I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
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