You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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