in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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