love makes seman taste better
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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