if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
