I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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