Small penises have feelings too.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
