you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
