marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
