im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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