3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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