very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
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