There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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