my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
