Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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