I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
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