This girl is more easily done than said...
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
