i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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