i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
