Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
did i just pee glitter
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
