Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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