funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize