what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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